Friday, September 26, 2008

I Fought the Lawn, & the Lawn Won . . .

Hubby is not yet fully recovered from his surgery, which means I'm still in charge of the lawn. Last time I did not use the trimmer because I had never used it before & I wanted to get things done as quickly as possible.

As I stated in my previous post, using the reel mower isn't all that quick and it is an arduous task, but apparently it is nothing compared to the unwieldy trimmer.

The grass was getting pretty long around the downspouts & foundation. Heaven forbid, I get a letter from the "Yard Guard" about the shabbiness of the lawn. Sigh, better use the trimmer.

I got an extension cord (a yellow one, I couldn't find the nice long blue one my husband uses), plugged in the trimmer, made sure there was line in it (probably should have done this BEFORE plugging it in), and figured out how to turn it on. I pressed the trigger and the motor made noise, but the do-dad wasn't spinning. I let go and looked at the do-dad again. Yup, there is definitely line in there. I could see the line sticking out even before I turned it over, but I looked any way. I figured if I had to call Hubby, the first thing he would ask was if there was a line in it so I had to verify.

I pressed the trigger again. I got more motor noise, but no spinning. For cryin' out loud, how difficult could this be???? At this point, I notice an orange handle that I hadn't fiddled with yet. I moved the handle, pressed the trigger & viola, SPINNING! I am woman, hear me roar!

I move toward the nearest downspout. I pressed the trigger and while there was spinning, nothing seemed to be happening to the grass around the downspout. I had the trimmer up too high so it was just blowing the grass. So I move it closer to the ground and heard a "RRRRRRRRRRRRRRP". Now instead of having six inches of grass around the downspout, we had 6/16 inches of grass on one side of the downspout. You think I moved it too close to the ground?

So I continue on my way down the foundation. There are several "RRRRRRRRRRRRP" noises along the way, but I was pushing on toward the front of the house. Sometimes, the trimming looked very professional - most of the time it didn't. Tough beans, I'm getting it done!

I now know how crop circles are made - huge trimmers!!! You can make a nice little line, then a big "RRRRRRRRRRRP" for the center. You get those concentric circles by standing in the middle of one of the "RRRRRRRRRRP's" and turning around. You can make rainbows, music notes, what ever you can imagine. Honestly, I don't know why the aliens don't get more creative.

After plugging the trimmer back into the extension cord half a dozen times & moving the entire operation to the front of the house, I had all the trimming done. Now I had to get out the lawn mower. I don't need to go through all that again - just read my previous post about lawns and armpits.

In the end I may have gotten the lawn trimmed & mowed, but I was whooped! I could barely hold a glass of water my biceps were so exhausted. In fact, I ended up putting a straw in the glass & set it on the counter. Then I sat on a stool and bent down to the straw. Even today, my arms & shoulders hurt.

Silver lining:
1. I worked out for the first time in weeks!
2. We have a beautiful yard.
3. I solved part of the crop circle mystery. I now know how, but why do they make them & why don't they stick around to take credit for their work???

4 People Laughed Along With Me, Won't You?:

Anonymous said...

Me thinks you're losing it girl friend!!!!!!! I have done a lot of things in my yard to make the neighbors come out and ask "NOW WHAT the HELL is she doing"? I think you take after your mother, hum???? You ARE tooooo funny:):)

Anonymous said...

OMG!!! I totally pictured you standing there with your cold glass of water and a straw wondering why your arms and hands won't stop shaking!!! Been there, done that. Thanks for the Fri afternoon laugh :-)


danny heiple said...

This by far is my favorite blog thus far. I can relate to the weed eater havok. I got the grass all the way to the dirt because I was not sure the string was coming out and then I had a good foot of it and when I pressed the button well who knew, it would take off and start cutting like it does. Oh yeah you should definately check for thread before plugging it, I did the same thing and got yelled at by my "supervisor" at the time. Keep up the great blogs :o)

Beth said...

I've had arguments with our weed wacker too, but the worst was the hedge trimmer. The last house had privet hedges all down the driveway, and I trimmed them while the husband mowed the grass. My hands would shake for hours afterward. I won't go into the time I managed to cut through two extension cords in two weeks -- one of them brand-new.

Related Posts Widget for Blogs by LinkWithin