Thursday, April 9, 2009

The Plan

Men think women put way too much thought into a gathering of any sort. Well, I have news for the guys – you’re no better.

“The guys” go out on the same night every week and it is almost always at the same place at the same time. This was one of these ordinary nights, but apparently some thought had to be put into it.

So here it is.

S (the defacto leader): I might be a bit late .. I have to do some work..Here is the project plan I put together.. (insert the sound of crickets chirping. Typical guy – there is no plan) Oh, and re-installing irix was as simple as constructing an atomic bomb in your garden shed, from 2 paperclips, some wood glue, and a dead panda, whilst your arms are tied behind your back.


J: Sounds like a good plan to me….

C: I plan on being there…….oh, and you may want to check, but I think there is a New Town ordinance requiring express written permission for building an atomic bomb in your garden shed. I heard that permit is slightly easier to get than a permit for the garden shed itself.

J: Also remember you are not permitted to keep live pandas on your property, so any of the aforementioned pandas must be killed offsite…

D: My project plan is to drink as much as R.

S: I will bring the helmet then. Apparently, D is a light-weight and has fallen off the stool after having just a few beers. I am running the things that I am supposed to be doing during the maintenance window now so I should be on time.

Does this mean he was multi-tasking or simply (actually) doing his job?

D: Is R going to be there?

S: So far R has not committed.

D: If he doesn't come that screws up my project plan.

R: Sorry, T (the wife) screwed up my plans tonight. And noooo it's nothing sexual related.

As far as he knows, it wasn’t sexual related. Maybe T had him committed. You know, being restrained in a white coat is erotic for some people.

The message from R came in after guys night had already commenced so S brought the helmet for nothing. Leave it to a man to screw up the plan.

By the way, the helmet had Care Bears on it – sounds masculine, doesn’t it? I’m sure they made D wear it regardless of R’s presence – like I said, he’s a light weight. It’s better to safe than sorry.

Silver Lining:

  1. My husband, in this case, is not R. I suppose that is somewhat obvious since I would not be “T”.

  2. My husband, got a new drink recipe, which I’ve dubbed the “Shirley Tumble”, as in drink a few of these, and you will surely tumble to the ground. 3 Olives vodka (cherry flavor) and sprite – ala Shirley Temple with a kick!

  3. Congratulations to J – you’ve accomplished your goal this week – your family made the blog! Your wife will be so proud!


7 People Laughed Along With Me, Won't You?:

Anonymous said...

W00T! At least the mention this week is a bit less...erm..."descriptive" than last weeks.

Jake

Pollyanna said...

You totally just gave yourself away!!!

Anonymous said...

I beleive "S" would be your husband (the defacto leader). Right?
This is too funny and such "manly style":):):):) THE MOM

Pollyanna said...

Nope, those would be everyone's real initials. Think about it - who could S be?

Anonymous said...

Then he would be "C" - it was a toss up between S or C, but then when R wasn't really your's I made a wild guess.

Sorry S for giving C the credit of coming up with your plan.

So did D fall off the chair wearing his helmet? By the way, WHAT was D's plan that R would ruin if he didn't show up?

Oh, this is so fun...just like playing CLUE - The MOM:)

Pollyanna said...

Nope again!

Hubby was just a casual observer.

Apparently, there was no falling - good for D, bad for blog.

Anonymous said...

SO HUBBY ISN'T EVEN IN THE STORY?
What a bunch of crap - he is not known to be "just a casual observer" - he's part of the plan and fun! Oh, that's right - there wasn't a plan because men never have a plan..........dah
The MOM

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