Wrong Number Gone Right

Has this ever happened to you?

You show up at an appointment with an acquaintance and she's not there. After a bit, it becomes apparent that she's not just running late.

So you're going to give her a call. Her number is in your planner, but since you used your cell phone to confirm the appointment earlier in the day, you're just going to choose her number from your call history.

She's more of an acquaintance so you don't have her name stored in your contacts list, but there's the number without a name attached to it.

You hit, "Call".

Ring-ring.

Ring-ring.

Hello?

Hey, it's Polly. Where are you? (very friendly and sing-songy and such)

I'm at home now and I really need some of that lotion.

Dead silence on my end.

I can swing by your place on Saturday and pick it up if that's ok with you.

You're racking my brain trying to figure out what is going on! Still not having a clue, you hear yourself saying, "Saturday? Sure, what time?"

I have this and that at noon, but then I've got blah, blah, blah. OMG! Got it! A customer you called three days ago when she happened to be at work and couldn't talk. Must have called you back when you were away from the phone. So how about 11:30?

Yes, yes, yes! [A la When Harry Met Sally] 11:30 is great! I'll have that lotion waiting for you!

You hang up, actually look at the call history, and call the right number.

Silver Lining:

1. I managed to reschedule the original appointment for Saturday at my house.


2. My customer had no idea I wasn't intending on calling her even though I asked where she was. Normally, that would sound like a really out of the norm question, but since I had caught her at work the last time I called, it sounded like I was really being super courteous even though I was actually being a bumbling idiot.


3. I got a sale and she's willing to come to me to get it. Bonus!

Saint Gemini the Devout

We have a nifty double oven. It's a Maytag Gemini that fits in the same space as a regular stove. You lose the pots & pans storage drawer, but you gain and extra oven - it's awesome!

Anywho, it is also very devout in following religious fasting practices.

Hubby was re-setting the time on the stove for the end of Daylight Savings time and this is what we expected: 9:37

Instead we got this: SABB ATH

None of the buttons on the stove would work. Not the cancel button, not the clock button, not the number buttons, NOTHING.

We needed the manual.

NOW!

This "Sabbath" mode would stay in effect for 72 hours. The oven would not turn on for 72 hours. This struck fear in the heart of Hubby. What do you mean no oven for 72 hours?

Back to the manual.

NOW!

If you push the "Clock" button for three seconds, the "Sabbath" mode would be cancelled.

Hubby jammed his thumb on the button for three seconds. The display started blinking and the time came back.

Woot! Woot!

A heathen dance was performed in the kitchen.

Then there was a beep.

And the display switched back to "Sabbath" again.

Hubby jammed his thumb on the button as hard as he could (I'm surprised it didn't go through the display and into the wall behind the stove). Again, we got blinking. Then, the time.

Now, he went ahead and started the oven. Anything to break the cycle.

The time actually changed by a minute and the oven started warming up.

Ha, HA! Take that!

More heathen dancing ensued.

The disabling the oven for 72 hours to encourage fasting is really a flawed idea. There are soooo many ways to get around it. For example:

• The burners still start.


• We have a microwave.


• We have a ton of cereal.


• Who said Spaghetti-o's had to be heated?


• Hubby's been known to open a can of chicken noodle soup and eat it right out of the can.


• Hello, take-out? We have a drawer full of menus.

I could go on and on, but I'll space you the details.

Hubby pressed cancel on the oven. No sense in wasting energy to warm it up any further.

Beep.

"Sabbath"

We have GOT to stop dancing!


Silver Lining:

1. Hubby finally pushed enough buttons to cause the stove to revert to factory settings. This meant it re-set to 12:00.
   
   And it's going to stay that way for at least an hour. We'll try again when it turns to 1:00.


2. Just in case, I've got three boxes of cereal in the pantry and two gallons of milk in the fridge. Good think I'm prepared for these kinds of emergencies.

I'm So Stressed About School, I Might Break Out

Not my first day of school, Cupie's!

I’m so stinkin’ tired right now. I was up until 1:30 selecting, editing & resizing pictures for the Cupie Slideshow. First day of kindergarten is tomorrow!!

It was open house at the school last night. Cupie met her teacher, put her supplies in her cubby and got a goody bag. This did not make Stinkles happy. I feel kind of bad for her because Cupie’s getting a lot of attention lately with new clothes, new shoes, new backpack, goody bags, bus assignments, no naps, staying up a little later.

On top of not being the center of attention, last night, Stinkles was mowed down by an obnoxious boy in a green shirt. Knocked her on her buttocks, spilled her lemonade and made her cookie break in two. She didn’t take it so well.

That little boy looked to be a school-ager. I hope he’s not in Cupie’s class. Good grief, he’ll probably turn out to be her first boyfriend. Well, maybe I’m getting ahead of myself.

Hubby won’t let her have a boyfriend anyway. Not until she’s at least 25 so we’ve got 20 years to go. He’s hardly amassed an arsenal of shot guns to ward off the boys, but he better get going. Ah, I remember way back then. Like me, my daughter is a social butterfly. Hubby is in deep – just ask my dad.

First, it’s that little boy in kindergarten. Then it’s the cutie on the skateboard. Before you know it there’s a peach-fuzzed lip teen ager standing on your door step asking to take your baby to the pizza place in his P.O.S. Festiva. I don’t want my daughter getting into any car called a Festiva – that totally sounds like a “fiesta” and no guy is going to have a fiesta with my daughter!

Am I getting ahead of myself again?

I am? That’s good because Hubby hasn’t started shooting lessons let alone actually purchased a shotgun. Besides, he hasn’t even started to build the shotgun rack he’s planning on mounting within plain view of the front door.

Let’s get back to the kindergarten issues, shall we?

I have to go to the grocery store to get lunch supplies. I’m a working mom. I have a hard time coming up with weekend meals that aren’t the same thing over and over. How am I going to keep Cupie fed seven days a week??? My repertoire is PB&J, chicken nuggets, cereal, fish sticks, mac & cheese, & hot breakfast. There’s more than that, but those are the items of the highest frequency on the grocery list. Help????

We haven’t picked out the first day of school outfit yet. We’ll have to make that a priority tonight. I don’t want to deal with it in the morning. It’s been bad enough lately with the, “Don’t make me tell you to get dressed again. . .” speeches that have become a regular occurrence. And these are just regular ole days – not THE FIRST DAY OF SCHOOL!

I swear, the first day of school outfit set the tone for the entire year when I was younger. You either dressed right or you were ostracized from the “IN” crowd for the rest of the year.

So, I went to the:

• first grade in knee high socks, knickers and suspenders


• sixth grade in my stretch pants, huge shirt with a side slung belt and earrings the size of your fist


• tenth grade in my tight rolled jeans, tucked in blousy pirate-ish shirt and hair the size of Texas

We moved right after I had started my junior year of school. I was so ticked off at my mom, I don’t remember what I wore after that.

Sorry about the fashion show. For those that are my age (you know who you are because you are laughing and thinking back to when you wore the same thing), you’re welcome for the trip down memory lane. For those who are younger, Google styles of the eighties & early nineties – trust me, you’ll laugh. For those who are older, go ahead and laugh – just remember you were the ones who thought fashion in the sixties and/or seventies was cool.

I’ve reached the age where I don’t care about being trendy. As long as something is pretty, fits comfortably, and doesn’t require dry cleaning, it’ll do. My boss frowns on pajamas in the work place, but I’ve got these pants that are super stretchy and light weight, it’s almost like wearing PJ’s. I wish I had them in a bunch of different colors.

I suppose I’ll also have to evaluate what I’m wearing at the bus stop tomorrow. I don’t want to embarrass Cupie on her first day. Who am I kidding? I might as well embarrass her – gotta make the money I’m going to spend on therapy worth it!

Silver Lining:

1. The first day of school only comes once a year. All the stress will be relieved by 8:30 tomorrow.


2. My daughter is like me – not shy. She shouldn’t have any trouble making new friends. Its one thing I’ve never had to stress about with her.


3. All of you are going to give me lots of lunch ideas. Lunch stress – relieved!

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